One Emotion

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September 26, 2006

This is your life: Yourself

This is the start of the “this is your life” series, and yourself is where it all starts. No matter how much you know about the world, if you truly intend to know about life and your life, you’ll be pressed to know more about yourself. Do you know yourself? Is that even possible? Do you know how you live? Do you know why? Why should you know more about yourself? What’s the point? Where are you now? How are you now? Who are you?

The alarm’s loud sound pops you out of sleep, “It is morning”, you think. “I want to sleep some more! ...” “No! I must get up now if I don’t want to be late” “Come on, I can have five more minutes…” “Wake up! Get out of bed” “Shut up! It’s warm and nice in here”. This is one of the dialogues you might have when you first wake up in the morning. This is a dialogue between you and yourself, yourself and you.

The keyword is “dialogue”: The internal dialogue, the mind chatter or just (vocal) thoughts. How many of those you have all day? How many of those are worthless? How many are useless? Who’s talking to whom? Are you the asker of the responder? Or maybe you’re neither, just the one who’s listening.

The keyword is “one”: Are you one? Are you many? Are you the same one when you think and feel those happy, loving thoughts and those other dark, hurtful thoughts? Are you yourself when you fuck up and say “this is not me, I’m better than this”? Are you really what you say you are? Are you what think you are? Are you yourself or what others want you to be? Are you what you want to be? Are you the one you see in the mirror? Are you the one you know you are? Are you the one you remember you were or the one you urge to become? Are you yourself?

The keyword is “yourself”: There’s a lot to ask about yourself. There sure is a lot to know. This is your life, this is yourself. “Know thyself” (as the wise say), know your life. If you think about it, everyday, from the moment you wake up, till you fall asleep, there is only yourself…

4 comments:

BeeBux said...

Very insightful. It just materializes into straight questions what no one dares to admit or put on paper (electronic that is), who are we really ?
But by thinking of all these questions and trying to find a rational answer, are we really giving a rational one or fooling ourselves with a "what might be" the best answer. Do we complicate our existence into thinking of all this and forgetting the part of "living" our life ?
Too many existential questions arise, like "Am I living for myself or am I living for the others". "Is my happiness an inner feeling in me cuz I am happy, or is it just the fact of seeing others happy even if I am miserable on the inside".

Too many questions, left unanswered, or maybe we just turn our back on the answers, cuz the truth...hurts !

BeeBz

Maya@NYC said...

First: this blog is a revelation!
second: great post! and kept me wondering....i like to believe that the "real me" escapes my understanding. everyday, all day i discover new facets in me. that's not the problem. the difficult part is learning to accept the different "you" as a single you. and be happy with it. it's called maturity. the sad thing is by the time we reach it, it's time to leave.

Anonymous said...

cousin you suck.. and u suck hard! but i'll always luv ya!

God Bless Sydney!

Cyn.ël said...

You just cured one of my uncountable reading deseases!!

You have a great coordination in your thoughts, and perfect progressive writing, in a way, I could never get bored while reading!!

I love the "Dialogues" part, I have too many of those!!! :)

Kepp writing, would love to read more!!!